Marriage – The Secret to Love and Happiness

Love and Marriage. Jenny and Deric Lostutter

Where there is love there is life.”
Mahatma Gandhi


By: Deric Lostutter


I never thought that I would see the day. Really, I was an awkward teenager, and even more of a train wreck in my 20’s.

I was a womanizer.

I was always on the move, from party to party, searching for my next opportunity to fill the void in my life that I felt. I never knew what that void was. I knew I needed companionship, but I never knew how to stabilize my relationships that I was in.

I was dirt, lower than dirt. I was that guy that called the girl the wrong name. 

Why am I telling you this? Because, I have made peace with my juvenile past, and elevated into adulthood.

People said we would be crazy for getting married so soon, but the moment I laid eyes on Jennifer, there was just this essence about her. The room stood still. I will never forget the day. The way she walked, her smile, her eyes. She took interest in me.

When I saw you, I fell in love, and you smiled because you knew.” – Arrigo Boito

She asked me how my day was and genuinely listened when I replied.

Who is this…what is this feeling? 

The more we talked, the more I was intrigued. Sure, she was an exotic dancer. She was also a mother, drug free, and 3 years into her political science degree.

I also worked in the night club industry at the time, behind the bar, or in the D.J. booth.

What did I have to lose? I had everything to gain.

We hung out and by day two were inseparable. We completed each other’s sentences, and all the rest of that corny stuff.

To be fully seen by somebody, then, and be loved anyhow–this is a human offering that can border on miraculous.”
Elizabeth Gilbert

We danced like robots on road trips to the worst of music, and reminisced over the ’90’s, an era of much simpler times.

Goals…those are important.

I asked her what her goals were.

She just wanted to be the best mother she could be, and find stability while exploring the world around her.

My goals were similar…stability was something I had never experienced. A volatile childhood, and a self destructive half a decade of my early 20’s meant that I was my own walking psychology project.

I wanted more than anything to be a father, and didn’t know if I could even have children, as I hadn’t produced any yet.

2 months into our relationship, we decided our futures in one night, in front of a group of friends and co-workers.

Why not? Fuck it, we love each other, we aren’t conventional, and what do we have to lose?”

Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength, while loving someone deeply gives you courage.”
Lao Tzu

Jantz, a bouncer friend of mine, bought us a round of drinks, my other friend, Treasure, yes that is her real name, jumped up and down in excitement for us telling the entire bar. Cheers erupted from the people surrounding us.

We hit the courthouse the next morning, got the certificate. We debated between a judge and a magistrate, finally I decided on a preacher I knew, one that mysteriously visited me in the hospital without anyone even knowing I was there to pray over me as I battle my heart condition.

I remember standing in his office, we had strangers for witnesses.

This was either the craziest, or the most beautiful thing I could imagine, and I voted beautiful.

Here we are husband and wife.

Many doubted us, many told us we wouldn’t last.

Through the hardships we have experienced, the hectic move that ended up in a 2 month homeless stint, the loss of our daughter Jade, and our fair share of arguments, we are stronger than ever, and continue to grow in the most beautiful of symbiotic love that one could experience.

Love recognizes no barriers. It jumps hurdles, leaps fences, penetrates walls to arrive at its destination full of hope.”
Maya Angelou

Bob Ross, himself, couldn’t depict in a painting, how we feel about each other.


What is our secret?


One word:



Who, being loved, is poor?”
Oscar Wilde






Deric Lostutter is a social activist and investigative journalist living in North Carolina with his wife.

He is currently engaged in multiple lawsuits against a growing list of people who have stalked and harassed him and his family for years, costing him employment, homes, and reputation. 

If you would like to donate to help Deric’s cause, you may do so at 

A portion of the proceeds raised and won will go to anti-bullying charities nationwide. 

If you would like to book Deric to speak about his experiences, you may do so via the contact form at

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7 thoughts on “Marriage – The Secret to Love and Happiness

  1. At what point does sex, drugs, and begging for money fit in here?

  2. Putting your wife online naked is REAL love huh? LOL

  3. As your twit states, “Beautiful Wife”. Beauty comes in many forms, abandoning children, drug addict, conspiracy, fraud, I can continue but we all know the rest. Like your fake claims and accolades, she just another notch in your long list of drug induced delirium. If you were any part of the MAN u claim to be, you would disappear. Allow all the trolls to move on. Instead you choose to fan the flame and give everyone more ammo to fire at your ignorant ass. And besides, if you two are so scared for your safety, why would you post pictures of your hotel room? Bar location? Which by the way, your able to afford while begging honest people for money.. We offered a certain number of gifts on your other faggot ass blog. If you would only accept them, you could be spending time in a forest somewhere with that beautiful wife of yours.. Hell, we’ll send doubles of everything.. Btw, she can’t take care of one child, what the fuck would she have done with another one? Seriously?

  4. Astro

    Slutter reminds me of Medusa.

  5. Astro

    You people are disgusting.

  6. Does your website have a contact page? I’m having a tough time locating
    it but, I’d like to shoot you an e-mail. I’ve got some suggestions for your blog you might be interested in hearing.

    Either way, great site and I look forward to seeing it develop over time.

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